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I guess I’ll have to set the scene a bit. I was about14 when I began to suspect I might be a lesbian; Ididn’t fancy boys as much as I fancied the women aroundme in school or in the small town I lived in, I had along term crush on the woman, Angela, who lived overthe road from us, she was about twice my age but everytime I saw her I’d get little butterflies in mystomach. As I got older I began to play with myselfwhile fantasizing about being in bed with her.By the time I was approaching 16 I knew I was alesbian, but in the small town I grew up in it wouldhave been virtually suicidal to come out, and being avery solitary girl I didn’t have a friend in whom Icould confide anything like that, so at weekends Istarted going to the city about 40 mile from town andbuying books about lesbians, but although theyconfirmed that they were out there they didn’t do muchto satisfy my curiosity about what lesbians actuallydid. So shortly before my 16th birthday I decided. Still how can she tell I just got off work?Is the smell of smoke and alcohol that strong?It must be, she couldn't possibly see my outfit beneath these cloths.But she knows, I just know it. The way she keeps looking at me from time to time, with that look of lowly pity... and disgust.Well what the hell does she want from me? Not everyone can be as good as she is! Not every one can be righteous and sinless. I have to pay the bills somehow.Besides, what's it too her that I do what I do? She doesn't know the hours I put in the gym, toning my body to perfection. She doesn't know how it's like performing before a bunch of salivating men. Its hard work. Why should she care what its all for?But she does care. She surely pity's me for using my body and not my mind. How loving of her. But that's where her love ends, I'm sure of it.In her eyes I'm nothing but a snake, a heathen snake. She's seen right through my thick coat, into my soul and seen the stripper inside.But what does she want me to.
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